Your Child Is Alive, Job Done.

Forget the emotional attachment. Forget the fact that an alive human squished out of your body. Even forget those heart stopping moments of pure unabashed love. Sometimes having a kid comes down to the basics -- like literally just keeping them alive. And we don't really appreciate the fact that when it all boils down, that is really what our job as parents is. Let's change that:

Has your kid not reached that milestone all his peers have? Fuck it, you've kept him alive! And that's pretty amazing. 

Did your child cry today? Are they still alive? Way to go mama! You did your job!

Did you child spit out or throw every morsel of food you gave them? He's still alive isn't he? Job done!

Hungover Parenting Strategies

We all know hangovers suck, but trust me, parenting first thing in the morning with a hangover is so much worse than you could imagine. After going through a particularly rough day recently I decided to share some strategies to dealing with your infant when you feel like a guilty dirty shameful excuse for a mom or dad.

Give Your Kid All the Things
You know all the things your child wants to touch but they never get to play with? Now is the time to give them to him. Let him play with whatever makes him the happiest and whatever keeps him occupied for the longest time so you can cry into the seam of the couch and try to pull it together