Tuesday, August 16, 2016

The Horrible Way I Explained Tattoos To My 5 Year Old Niece

Today my 5 year old niece asked me "Auntie, what's that stamp on your back?"

Yes, my niece pointed out my tramp stamp.

Now, while I dislike my bad tattoo I don't regret it, because it reminds me of how stupid I once was; A time when I had no foresight and laughed in the face of consequence. But this is not my child, and she's 5, so I did the responsible thing and told her it was a tattoo, and she should never get one because it doesn't come off.

She was having a hard time grasping it's permanence, and why that could be a problem. So without thinking, this analogy came out of my mouth:

        Me: "You know when you like quesadillas one day, but the next day you don't really like them? 
        Her: "Yeah"
        Me: "Well... getting a tattoo is like having a quesadilla every single day for the rest of your life, whether you like it or not."

This surprisingly seemed to satisfy her. Immediately after it came out of my mouth I realized - this is the kind of parent I am. The kind that likens tattoos to quesadillas.

I can't decide if I'm shambles or a frickin' genius.

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