I Don't Know How to Raise A Boy

Approaching 20 weeks into my pregnancy I was excited and nervous. Not only would it be the first (and only) time I actually saw the baby growing inside of me, but I was going to find out the gender of my child. 

I didn't realize how important gender was to me until I actually heard the words 'It's a boy'. I had wanted a boy. I was elated. But about two days later my head started to spin. I didn't know anything about boys! What the hell was I going to do with a little boy?

To My Pregnant Sister...

My sister: I am so happy you are pregnant and going to have a sweet baby soon. But thinking back to when my son was born 4 months ago, I realize that I might have said some things about birth and being a new mom that scared you. So I wanted to clarify them for you now. 

When I said labour was hell...

I meant it. 

The uncertainty was so scary. The contractions were the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. My water breaking was weird and gross and felt like the biggest period of my life gushing every time I stood up... for 18 hours straight. I screamed and cried and yelled just like the movies, but way longer. I told the nurse I couldn't do it, because I really didn't think I could.